TEASER

SILVUS: “On the charge of evading your taxes, I find you both guilty! And I sentence you to ten years hard labor. If you won’t pay what you owe, then by Hades you’ll work it off! As to the charge of celebrating the Winter Solstice. I find you guilty of singing carols and decorating a tree twelve more months! Take ‘em away.”
SOLDIER: “Yes sire. You heard King Silvus. Remove the prisoners.”
SECOND SOLDIER: “Ahh to the poor house with you move it.”
OLD MAN: “But we’re too old to live in a poorhouse.”
SECOND SOLDIER: “Then you’ll die there.”
SILVUS: “Senticles.”
SENTICLES: “Yes your Majesty.”
SILVUS: “Have you prepared the eviction lists for today?”
SENTICLES: “Today? But sire, today is sol.”
SILVUS: “Yes?”
SENTICLES: “Today is so late. So late looks nearly dark.”
SILVUS: “Then I suggest you hurry. Unless you want to add your name to that parchment! Court adjourned!”
GABRIELLE: “Now no spying and if one of us sees the other shopping in a stall, then she turns and walks the other way agreed?”
XENA: “Yeah.”
GABRIELLE: “No peeking into other peoples’ bags, too. I mean being surprised is half the fun right?”
XENA: “Right.”
GABRIELLE: “Ah nothing can cost more than five dinars.”
XENA: “Then why don’t I just give you five dinars and you can buy something that you really like?”
GABRIELLE: “Because then it wouldn’t be a gift. Hey! What was that about?”
XENA: “He stole my chakram. I’ll meet you out back.”
XENA: “Pardon me.”
XENA: “Coming through!”
GIRL: “Now all we need is a Solstice pudding.”
BOY: “And a goose. Don’t forget the goose.”
GIRL: “Lynal can you get us a goose, too?”
LYNAL: “One goose? We’ll need more than that.”
GIRL: “The round thing looks like the king’s crest.”
LYNAL: “In honor of his cold heart.”
XENA: “Nice tree.”
MELANA: “It’s all right, it’s all right. May I help you?”
XENA: “Yes that’s mine.”
MELANA: “Lynal.”
LYNAL: “I just borrowed it for the tree. I was gonna give it back.”
GABRIELLE: “Funny how the ribbons bring out its shine.”
XENA: “It’s not an ornament.”
LYNAL: “Flashy thing like that? What else could it be?”
CHILDREN: “Yeah, what else?”
SENTICLES: “Hear ye! Hear ye!”
MELANA: “Children, children. Settle down.”
SENTICLES: “By order of King Silvus, be it known you have until midnight tonight to pay taxes in the amount of 1000 dinars or face eviction.”
SOLDIER: “No wait, look around. They’re violating the prohibition. I say, arrest them now!”
XENA: “Ayiyiyiyiyiyiyi! Gabrielle!”
GABRIELLE: “I didn’t know you did gift-wrapping.”
XENA: “What did he mean ‘violating the prohibition’? The children were just enjoying Solstice.”
MELANA: “Yes but here celebrating the winter solstice is a crime and anyone who gets caught can expect to pay a price.”

 


ACT I


GABRIELLE: “How could you work for a man who would put orphans on the street on Solstice Eve?”
SENTICLES: “I like to eat. When King Silvus outlawed toy-making, I had to take whatever job I could.”
GABRIELLE: “You were a toymaker?”
XENA: “Nice try Let’s throw him in the cell with the guards.”
GABRIELLE: “No wait, wait. Senticles, Senticles. Of course! When I was a little girl, I had a toy made It was this wooden lamb whose mouth would open when you pulled its tail. Oh, I loved that toy.”
SENTICLES: “I remember that one. You know it took me two days to figure out that mouth joint and weeks to carve his fleece. Oh yes he was a real challenge.
XENA: “So now you work for the man that put you out of business. King Silvus sounds like quite a guy.”
SENTICLES: “Well he’s always been a hard man but the Queen used to temper him. and one solstice eve, about thirty years ago Queen Inalia suddenly died. He hasn’t been the same since.”
XENA: “I understand his loss but that’s no excuse for banning Winter Solstice.”
MELANA: “That’s true but as hard as his laws are on others, I imagine the loneliness must caused the king to be even worse.”
GABRIELLE: “That reminds me of a story I heard once.”
CHILDREN: “A story? Tell us!”
GABRIELLE: “OK, OK, OK, OK, ha! Sit down. Once in a land far away, there was this rich but miserly man named Cresus and his heart was so hard that his servants begged the gods to intervene. They sent the Fates to separate the strands of his life, so that he might see himself more clearly. Unfortunately Cresus didn’t mend his ways.
CHILDREN: “What? Why not?”
GABRIELLE: “So the gods turned him into a spirit, doomed to walk the Earth forever as invisible to others as they were to him in life.”
BOY: “I don’t like this story.”
GABRIELLE: “Actually I didn’t like the end to that story, anyway and I bet we could change it”
CHILD: “Maybe we could.”
GABRIELLE: “ if we tried?”
GABRIELLE: “Look if we can change the king’s mind without changing his anatomy, think of the example it’ll be to the children.”
XENA: “Gabrielle the eviction notice is set at midnight. If we don’t stop it these kids are out on the street.”
GABRIELLE: “I know but it will work.”
XENA: “And what if it doesn’t?”
GABRIELLE: “We clobber him. Please just try it my way just this once In honor of the Solstice?”
XENA: “All right if it means that much to you but we’re going to need disguises and access to the castle.”
XENA: “Hi.”
GABRIELLE: “33, 34, 35 that’s it.”
XENA: “You’ll have to stretch it as far as you can. We need everything on the list to make it work.”
GABRIELLE: “Trust me Xena. If there’s one thing I know, it’s how to bargain. You just worry about getting to King Silvus without cracking heads.”
XENA: “Deal’s a deal.”
SENTICLES: “Yo!”
XENA: “Right Senticles?”
SENTICLES: “I’ll take you to him all right. It’s just that, well how do I know you’re not an assassin?”
XENA: “Because if I was he’d be dead already.”
SENTICLES: “Works for me.”

XENA: “Good. You get everything we need and I’ll meet you back at the orphanage.”
MAN: “You stubborn ass! You’ve been nothing but trouble the entire time we’ve been together. Now move!”
GABRIELLE: “Excuse me sir. That’s quite an animal you’ve got there.”
MAN: “You want him? He’s yours. Fifty dinars.”
GABRIELLE: “Fifty?”
MAN: “That’s what the tannery will give me for his hide.”
GABRIELLE: “You’re taking him to be skinned? Look How ‘bout I do you a favor? I’ll take him off your hands for say ah, 25 dinars?”
MAN: “25? That’s half of what he’s worth at the tannery.”
GABRIELLE: “Yeah well you have to get him there first right.?”
MAN: “Hmm, 45.”
GABRIELLE: “30 Not a dinar more. Let’s face it. I’ve seen healthier hides on a used couch Nothing personal. What do you say?”
MAN: “35 and you got yourself a deal.”
XENA: “You’re a lucky man Silvus. Now surprise me and be smart too. Wake up!”
SILVUS: “Ahh! Who are you?! How did you get in here?! What do you want?”
XENA: “My name’s Xena. We need to talk.”
SILVUS: “Listen anything you want. Take it. Jewels, money, anything take it, take it. Just have mercy on an old man.”
XENA: “The same kind of mercy you showed that orphanage you’re closing?”
SILVUS: “Orphanage?”
XENA: “You signed the order yourself.”
SILVUS: “Maybe so. I issue so many time’s being what they are.”
XENA: “And whose fault is that? Did you ever stop to think that maybe if you eased up on your people a little let them celebrate Solstice perhaps the times might ease up too?”
SILVUS: “Wait a minute. You’re one of those Solstice lovers, aren’t ya? One of those rebels who thinks that everything and everyone should stop once a year just to raise a glass, eat a goose, unwrap gifts! Well you know what I say to that?”
XENA: “Bet I can guess.”
SILVUS: “Guards! Guards! Quick!”
GUARD: “Coing, Sire!”
XENA: “You petty tyrants so predictable but heed my warning Silvus. Change your ways or suffer the consequences.”
SILVUS: “No! Inalia’s gone for good and so’s the Solstice.”
GUARD: “Break it down!”
XENA: “This isn’t over Silvus. The truth is it’s just begun.”
GUARD: “Stop her!”
XENA:
“Ay-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi-yi!”

 


ACT II


XENA: “Inalia.”
GABRIELLE: “I’m sorry there’s nothing I can do. I’m afraid you have to leave. Look I know it’s not fair especially on Solstice Eve but what can I do? Look I know, I know but Melana said you can’t stay inside and the place is hers, until midnight. Look I guess, I guess it’s bunking under the stars for you my friend. Now let’s go. Come on, I’ll stay with you so you won’t get lonely. Come on. Tobias come on! You know I’m beginning to understand your former owner.”
LYNAL: “Come on you rugrats time to wash up”

Lynal whistles

GABRIELLE: “Well I’ll be.”

Gabrielle whistles

GABRIELLE: Just like Argo. I wonder what Xena will say to this.”
XENA: “Nice work. You just saved someone years in prison changing the sentence like that.”
SENTICLES: “It’s nothing. I change a letter here, a number there. Hoping to do a little good but believe me it’s nothing.”
XENA: “So is your part in my plan. It’s nothing. All you have to do is.”
SENTICLES: “No! I won’t risk being arrested I can’t. I’d die locked up in a cell, closed in like that. I couldn’t face going to prison.”
XENA: “What do you think would happen if the king found out about these changes you made to his orders?”
SENTICLES: “Found out? But surely you wouldn’t you couldn’t.”
XENA: “Of course not but the point is, if he did find out, you’d be thrown in prison anyway. You’re braver than you give yourself credit for. So don’t deny your courage, or the children.”
GABRIELLE: “And from that day on, we’ve honored and celebrated it as a time of rebirth for our wishes and our dreams. The time of coming together in joy and peace. It’s the shortest day of the year and the longest night but on this special night a new light, a new chance is born to us all. So it’s a time for miracles and goodwill towards all living creatures. That’s why the Winter Solstice means so much and touches us all so deeply.”
GIRL: “I have a Solstice wish.”
CHILDREN: “Me too!”
GABRIELLE: “Let’s hear it.”
GIRL: “I wish we could have a big Solstice dinner with all the trimmings.”
CHILDREN: “Me too.” “Yeah.”
SECOND GIRL: “I wish we could each have a Solstice present of our very own.”
BOY: “I wish everyone in the world could be as happy as we are right now.”
MELANA: “I think those are all fine wishes. Now why don’t we go and gather our stockings and put them by the fireplace? Come on let’s go.”
XENA: “You’d better hope this plan works. Otherwise I’ll do whatever it takes to keep those kids from getting hurt.”
GABRIELLE: “She’s a very physical person. I completely agree with you. If the plan fails we punch faces. Until then we do it peacefully in the spirit of Solstice.”
XENA: “Who’s your friend?”

Gabrielle Laughs

GABRIELLE: “Xena meet Tobias. Now isn’t he sweet? And he’strained just like Argo you just whistle. He cost me all of our money but I couldn’t let him go to a tannery not on Solstice Eve.”
XENA: “It’s all right. I got everything we need at the castle. Now all we have to do is figure out the details and then hope I can restrain myself long enough to pull it off.”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “Silvus wake up. Silvus arise. Open you eyes. Silvus wake up!”
SILVUS: “Oh what is this, the town square?! Who are you? What do you want?!”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “Mankind calls me Clotho First of the Fates, whose province is the past.”
SILVUS: “Nonsense! You’re nothing but a dream probably brought on by indigestion a fatty piece of beef a bit of gristle. Get out and let me sleep!”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “Your commands have no sway over me. Rather I command you to arise and walk by my side.”
SILVUS: “How do I know you’re really a Fate? For all I can tell you could be a thief or another of those Solstice cracks.”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “Hmm perhaps this will convince you that time is mine to rule as I will. I am the Fate of the past.”
SILVUS: “Long past?”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “Your past which I will show you then you will turn to the present with my sister and as for your future.”
SILVUS: “All right I believe you. What now?”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “Come!”
SILVUS: “Where are we going?”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “To a place you have forgotten though it haunts your every thought.”
GABRIELLE AS INALIA: “Silvus Silvus. Dear husband.”
SILVUS: “Inalia?”
GABRIELLE AS INALIA: “Stop! Come no closer. I am but a shadow from your past. Sent to beg you turn from your narrow, greedy ways before it’s too late.”
SILVUS: “Too late? Great Zeus.”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “Here drink this.”
SENTICLES: “Easy big fella. Steady steady, big boy.”
GUARD: “Hey, check this out.”

Guard Whistles

GUARD:
Hey! How would you like to spend a weelend im Athens with that?”


 


ACT III


Gabrielle Whistles

XENA AS CLOTHO: “A warning that our time is nearly up.”
SILVUS: “No not yet. Don’t leave me Inalia please not again.
GABRIELLE AS INALIA: “I’m sorry Silvus. You’ve grieved long enough. You must forget my death on that Solstice Eve so long ago.”
SILVUS: “Death? What do you mean? You you didn’t die. You you you walked out on me. I don’t understand.”
GABRIELLE AS INALIA: “I was speaking metaphorically. We we shadows from the past tend to do that.”
XENA AS CLOTHO: “Yeah.”
SILVUS: “Meta metaphor. Wait what’s what’s going on here? What’s happening? Who who are?”
GABRIELLE: “Is he all right?”
XENA: “Fine but that sleeping herb I put in his wine won’t last long. We’d better get moving.”
GABRIELLE: “I thought Senticles said his wife was dead.”
XENA: “He also said he’d handle Tobias. We start Phase 2. You get changed and see what happened. I’ll meet you back at the orphanage.
GABRIELLE: “OK.”
XENA: “Come on King.”

Guard Whistles

GABRIELLE: “Senticles. Senticles. Where are you? Senticles. Tobias Good job boy. Now where’s Senticles? What? Are you trying to tell me something? Do you know where Senticles is? OK let’s find him. Smart donkey.”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “Silvus wake up!”
SILVUS: “Am I to understand that you are.”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “Lachesis second of the Fates. Here to show your present. Now arise and dress.”
SILVUS: “Put on these? But I’m the king. Why would I wear something common as this?”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “Tonight we go among your subjects as anonymous to them as they are to you. The better to show you how your cruel laws and harsh judgments affect them.”
SILVUS: “To what point? In hopes I’ll change my life?”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “In the hopes that you might change theirs. Unless you’d like me to find a more forceful way of persuading you. Uh uh You won’t be needing that.”
GABRIELLE: “Hello Senticles are you in there? Hello! It’s me Gabrielle. Senticles. What happened? You were supposed to stay with Tobias. You know Xena and I were nearly caught.”
SENTICLES: “So was I. Two guards came by. If I hadn’t run, I don’t know what would have happened.”
GABRIELLE: “You ran away?”
SENTICLES: “Well what else could I do? You didn’t expect me to stay there and get caught, did you?”
GABRIELLE: “No no but what about us? What about Tobias?”
SENTICLES: “You forget I’ve seen your warrior friend in action. I knew you’d be OK. As for the donkey What are they gonna do to a donkey? Whereas me they could lock in prison for the rest of my life. It’s like I told your friend I can’t do that. I can’t. Shut up in a small space, I’d die. Look I’m sorry if I let you down but I warned you I’m no hero. So why don’t you just go all right, just leave me alone! Go!”
GABRIELLE: “What is all this?”
SENTICLES: “It’s nothing. I shouldn’t have left them out.”
GABRIELLE: “Are you crazy? It’s amazing. Look at all these toy. Her eyes open and close.”
SENTICLES: “Yes well that’s because I use this little.”
GABRIELLE: “Oh look at this. This is exactly like the toy I had growing up remember? I told you how much it meant to me. Oh all these toys. They’d mean so much to the orphans too Don’t you think? Every child could have a toy of his very own.”
SENTICLES: “That would be true if they were legal which they aren’t.”
GABRIELLE: “Well don’t worry about that. By the time we’re done with King Silvus he’ll be handing them out himself. We could use this We could take the toys to the orphanage and hide them and uh uh I’ll have to disguise you, just in case we do run into guards. We don’t want them to recognize you.”
SENTICLES: “No I won’t risk going to prison.”
GABRIELLE: “Look you say you’re afraid of small spaces. Well that’s exactly how you live your whole life in a small space afraid to stand up for yourself or anyone else. Don’t you see? What you’re most afraid will happen, has happened? The question is what are you going to do about it?”
SILVUS AS PEASANT: “I know, I know it’s it’s late. So, ah slam the door if you want to. Wouldn’t surprise me a bit.”
LYNAL: “Slam the door? On Solstice Eve? That’s a good one. Come in. How can I help you?”
SILVUS AS PEASANT: “Well We are we’re we’re”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “Strangers.”
SILVUS AS PEASANT: “Strangers right. We’re strangers. We’ve been uh, travelling all day and we we.”
LYNAL: “Need a bit of food and drink? Well we don’t have much but you’re welcome to share what we’ve got.”
SILVUS AS PEASANT: “Oh.”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “The charity of your king and country is legendary.”
LYNAL: “Our king? Charitable? You really are strangers here.”
SILVUS AS PEASANT: “What’s that supposed to mean?”
LYNAL: “Just that King Silvus is the meanest most tight-fisted ruler this side of the Aegean.”
SILVUS AS PEASANT: “Is that so?”
LYNAL: “Absolutely you’ve heard of Midas right? Greediest man in the world, until Hercules helped him. Well, our king makes him look like Lady Bountiful.”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “Surely you exaggerate.”
LYNAL: “I wish! This is an orphanage and ‘cause we can’t pay our taxes, King Silvus is kicking us out of here at midnight. What kind of king does that to kids on Solstice Eve?”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “Good question.
GABRIELLE: “Coast is clear.”
SENTICLES: “Let’s go.”
GABRIELLE: “Come on Tobias.”
SOLDIER: “Remember the king’s command. Any resistance we storm in full force.”
SENTICLES: “Look they’re headed straight for the orphanage.”
GABRIELLE: “We have to warn Melana.”
SENTICLES: “How? They’ll be guarding the doors.”
GABRIELLE: “Well then we’ll find another way inside. OK? Come on.”


The children sing a Solstice night song.

SILVUS: “Take me home. I’ve seen and heard enough.”
XENA AS LACHESIS: “Enough to stop your eviction? Enough to bring back Winter Solstice?”
SILVUS: “Enough! I won’t be lectured especially when it’s all your fault.”
XENA AS LACHESIS: : “My fault?”
SILVUS: “If you Fates hadn’t separated Inalia and me I might have been a different man a better king but you did you let her leave. She walked out on me just as I’m walking out on you right now! Happy Solstice!”
SOLDIER: “Halt! You’re under arrest by order of the king.”
SILVUS: “Don’t be absurd. I am the king.”
SOLDIER: “Right and I’m the Queen of the Amazons. Seize them!


 


ACT IV


XENA AS LACHESIS: “Hold it boys. Where’s your Holiday Spirit?”
SOLDIER: “What are you waiting for?! Arrest them!


Fight

SILVUS: “Did you see that? They attacked me! Me their king!”
LYNAL: “You and your friend better go.”
XENA: “I’m not going anywhere.”
LYNAL: “Xena! Thank the gods it’s you! The guards in the basement have escaped!”
XENA: “Believe me Lynal that is the least of our worries.”
SOLDIER: “Attention everyone in the building. Either you come out voluntarily or we’re coming in to get you but either way, you’re gone!”
MELANA: “Are you sure he’ll be all right?”
XENA: “His pulse is strong. Once the shock wears off, he should be fine.”
MELANA: “Dear gods I hope so.”
XENA: “On second thought maybe you should stay with him just in case anything develops.”
MELANA: “But I can’t. I mean what about the children?”
XENA: “Lynal will look after them. Right?”
LYNAL: “Well sure but who’s gonna help you?”

Senticles screams

Gabrielle screams

XENA: “Go and see to the kids. The reinforcements have arrived.”
SENTICLES: “I did it! The gods be praised! I did it! That chimney is dark and cold as a grave but I just grabbed my sack of toys and Ho-ho-ho! Down I came! And you know what? I liked it! I did it was fun! By Zeus! I’m gonna do that every Solstice Eve! Just see if I don’t.”
GABRIELLE: “That’s great Senticles but we’ve got a problem here. Xena there are a troup of guards outside.”
XENA: “I know.”
GABRIELLE: “I guess my plan didn’t work after all So I guess we have to slash and crash but thanks for trying. Ahh. Back to business as usual, right?”
SOLDIER: “All right we gave ‘em a chance. Now in the name of King Silvus, attack!”
XENA: “Let the games begin. Hah!”

Fight

GABRIELLE: “Boys! Come and get your Solstice present. You wanna help me play with it? Senticles!”
SENTICLES: “Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!”
SILVUS: “Ah. The gods defend me. You’re the third one the Fate of the future am I right? Atropos come to show me my! What is it? What is this place? Tell me Why am I here? It’s dark and cold as a grave? Is that it? Is this my tomb? And that that noise like souls crying out in pain. Is this my future? No, no, don’t leave me. Just tell me does it have to be? This place my death? Can it change if I change my life? Please I I don’t want to die alone. I’ve lived that way for thirty years. I can change. I know I can. No! I won’t go with you, not yet. You’ll see I’ll show you. I’ll prove to you I’m not the man I was. I’m not!”

Fight

SOLDIER: “Stop her! This way! Aroud the back! ”
XENA: “Great stocking stuffers.”
SENTICLES: “Go ahead make my day.”
XENA: “Thanks.”

Fight

GABRIELLE: “Nah.”
XENA: “Gabrielle get me a sword.”
GABRIELLE: “This guy’s driving me nuts!”
CHILD: “Come on.”
LYNAL: “Load your weapons! Ready! Fire! Yeah!”
SOLDIERS: “You call yourself soldiers? Getting beaten by women and children?” “Right come on!” “We’ll make them pay.” “You’re pathetic! Now tighten your ranks! Look sharp! Come on charge!”

Pillow fght

CHILDREN: Cheer
SILVUS: “Did you see them run?! Like rabbits?! Yes sir! Ha-ha! There’ll be no evictions here! Not tonight! Not ever!”
GABRIELLE: “Your Majesty this is the woman who runs the orphanage. Her name’s.”
SILVUS: “Inalia.”
INALIA: “Yes.”
SILVUS: “Oh my dearest wife. Can you ever forgive me for closing my heart to you and to our people? For wasting thirty precious years in bitterness and greed? I know I don’t deserve it but please say you’ll try.”
INALIA: “I heard what you said and I forgive you with all my heart.”
XENA: “I guess you got that happy ending you wanted.”
GABRIELLE: “And then some.”
JOSEPH: “Excuse me please. Could you tell us which is the road going west?”
XENA: “You’re on it. There’s a town on the way if you’re looking for food and shelter. We’d be happy to help you get there.”
JOSEPH: “Mmm you’re very kind but, we’re in a hurry. Come dear the caravan won’t wait.”
MARY: “Yes, we’re coming.”
GABRIELLE: “Wait a minute. If you’re in a hurry then wouldn’t it be faster if your wife and child rode the distance?”
JOSEPH: “Well, of course but we don’t have the means to.”
GABRIELLE: “You do now.”
JOSEPH: “For us? But it’s too much. We can’t accept it.”
GABRIELLE: “Sure you can, if you can whistle. Call it a um call it a Solstice gift for the baby.”
MARY: “May God smile on you always for your kindness.”
GABRIELLE: “Thank you. Tobias now take good care of these people OK? Don’t be stubborn. I’ll miss you too.”
XENA: “That was a nice thing you did back there.”
GABRIELLE: “What would I do with a silly old donkey anyway?”
XENA: “Uh huh.”
GABRIELLE: “They needed him more than me. Besides they seem pretty nice.”
XENA: “Mm hmm.”
GABRIELLE: “After all it is Solstice.”
XENA: “Oh that’s right. Happy Solstice.”
GABRIELLE: “Well what? Oh I don’t have a gift for you.”
XENA: “Gabrielle you are a gift to me.”

 

Fade To Black
back to the top